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Why I Prioritize Self Care

March 27, 2019 21 Comments

Someone once asked me if I was doing enough for self care, my response was surprisingly quick. “Honey, I’m the QUEEN of self care!”. I said it with such confidence that I think it takes many people off guard. Only a few short years ago, this was not the case for me! Self care is something I have had to grow into doing and choose to prioritize for the sake of myself, and my family.

We have become conditioned to the thought that we need to go, go, go and give, give, give without investing in our own wellbeing. I can sit here and tell you that at some point, you WILL burn out! In a day and age when more is expected from parents than ever before, it is impossible to keep up with the demands and not feel depleted, very quickly. And worse, when we do try to carve some time out for ourselves, we can be judged for it. It sometimes seems like a lose-lose scenario! I’m hoping to inspire you today, to make yourself a priority! I’m giving you permission to spend time, attention and even money on YOU! And yes, I KNOW how hard that can be!

Here is the thing! Self care can look very different to different people. There have been days that for me, self care meant taking a shower AND brushing my teeth, or doing the grocery shopping kid free (which let’s be honest, lowers the stress factor by at least 80%!). These are very basic examples, and obviously don’t cost much at all. I really want to encourage you to think bigger than that! Some friends enjoy carving out time for the gym and are investing in their physical health, and I applaud them! Lately I have been splurging more on myself with “luxurious self care” by taking a full day at the spa to relax and unwind or attending a weekend women’s retreat, and I have to tell you, it is incredible! These are not every day activities, and as such I feel SO much more rejuvenated when I am able to partake in them!

A few years ago, when it first occurred to me that I would benefit from a day away from all the responsibilities that come with parenthood, I was overwhelmed with guilt! I felt like it was “wrong” of me to want to take a few hours to myself and spend so much money that could be used in other ways, it almost ruined the experience. I even had people make snarky comments about being away from Arthur for so long, and about spending so much money on myself. That’s not what “good moms do”. It was very hard to put that out of my mind, but what I realized is that my value as a parent is not measured by the hours I’m near my family, but the way I treat my family when I’m near them! I shared in my Survival Tips for Solo Parenting post that self care is not saying “me first, but saying me too!” It can feel selfish, but I think showing up as our best is actually one of the most important things we can do for those around us!

I’m so far from the perfect mum, but even at a young age, Arthur recognizes that when I take time out for myself, I am better at doing my “job” as his mother! I want my child to grow up in a home where he learns the importance of doing things that fill up your cup, so you can be the best you possible! I was recently diagnosed by my doctor with anxiety. Self care has been so critically important in coping with my emotions, and I’m not about to feel ashamed doing something that I know is so good for me, and by proxy, my child.

This is a topic I’m quite passionate about, self care is one of the greatest tools I have to keep me sane in a busy season of life! I am very protective of it and I hope that by sharing openly, I can be an encouragement to other people, to take back that little bit of whatever feeds you! I’m looking forward to writing more on this topic very soon!

Love ya,

Filed Under: Lifestyle, Parenting Tagged With: anxiety, boy mom, great mom, health, Mental health, self care, Spa day, Thermea, Thermea Nordic Spa, wellbeing

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Chris says

    March 28, 2019 at 5:25 pm

    Self care is so important. As an introvert it is a requirement. Thanks for the encouragement.

    Reply
    • kalynnjoyce says

      March 28, 2019 at 5:37 pm

      Thanks for checking it out!!! I hope you get out and do something wonderful for yourself soon!

      Reply
  2. Erin says

    March 28, 2019 at 6:17 pm

    Self care is everything!!

    Reply
    • kalynnjoyce says

      March 28, 2019 at 6:19 pm

      It really is such a needed and often neglected part of our lives!

      Reply
  3. Sarah says

    March 28, 2019 at 6:21 pm

    Self care is so important and I’m happy so many people are taking about. It’s helpful to see other peoples benefits from it too

    Reply
    • kalynnjoyce says

      March 28, 2019 at 6:23 pm

      Thank you for your comment! Yes, it is critical to me being a “good person”, and I really hope it encourages others to drop the guilt and just enjoy taking time for themselves!

      Reply
  4. stephany says

    March 28, 2019 at 6:55 pm

    Not gonna lie, I need a little more self care!

    Reply
    • kalynnjoyce says

      March 28, 2019 at 7:14 pm

      Most of us do! Take this as your reminder, YOU are WORTH IT!!!

      Reply
  5. Angel says

    March 28, 2019 at 8:24 pm

    As a SAHM I definitely feel guilty for doing a little self care. After all it’s MY job to care for the kids right? I enjoyed your article and will definitely be working on changing my mindset and taking care of me a little more.

    Angel | Mommy-ing Differently

    Reply
  6. Ann says

    March 28, 2019 at 9:30 pm

    I need more self care in my life!! You have inspired me.

    Reply
    • kalynnjoyce says

      March 28, 2019 at 9:36 pm

      I’m so glad! I hope you find something you really enjoy that helps fill your cup!

      Reply
  7. Kim Wetherall says

    March 28, 2019 at 11:50 pm

    It is so important to look after numero uno! This was a great read-thank you

    Reply
  8. Kale @ steakandkale.com says

    March 29, 2019 at 12:17 am

    I need some self care…going to make a plan right now!

    Reply
    • kalynnjoyce says

      March 29, 2019 at 1:21 am

      Yay!!! I’m so glad you are making a plan! You deserve it!

      Reply
  9. Lorena @ www.lorenaylennox.com says

    March 29, 2019 at 2:35 am

    I love this. I really need to move self-care to the top of my priority list. It seems to be getting worse the more into blogging I get :-/

    Reply
    • kalynnjoyce says

      March 29, 2019 at 3:14 am

      It can be so hard to make it a priority, but I feel like we are stronger in the other areas of our life when we put our needs higher on the list!

      Reply
  10. Sherry says

    March 29, 2019 at 3:57 am

    I completely agree that self-care is so important! I experienced burn-out on more than one occasion, then decided to invest in my own wellbeing. EVERYBODY benefits when we take care of ourselves! 😀

    Reply
  11. Amanda says

    March 29, 2019 at 1:41 pm

    Love this. I am huge on self care for myself and for talking with others about it. It is so important to take care of ourselves.

    Reply
  12. Annie says

    March 29, 2019 at 2:15 pm

    This is so great! Was just talking to a friend about going to the Rachel Hollis conference the other day. And how it seems like such a luxury, but I like your perspective. This is such a critical, often neglected topic. Look forward to reading your future thoughts on it 🙂

    Reply
  13. Julia from Balancing Bravely says

    March 30, 2019 at 12:42 am

    Love the authenticity here. Like your line – That’s not what “good moms do”.

    Good for you for overcoming that mom guilt to do what you need to do for you!

    Reply
  14. Tiffany says

    March 30, 2019 at 5:40 pm

    This is so so good and equally important. Self-care is often neglected. It’s time for change!

    Reply

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